Next month, the Hellfire Gala officially begin. It’s the big “coming out” party for Krakoa and Emma Frost and the Hellfire Trading Company have gone all-out. Jumbo Carnation (and the artists at Marvel) have churned out a dizzying array of outfits for the various X-Men, X-Villains, and otherwise who will be attending the Gala. Though some are winners (more on that in an upcoming piece), there are quite a few fashion mistakes being made. More than the WTF we expect from high fashion, these looks are dull, ugly, or just plain wrong for the characters wearing them.
#10 Kate Pryde
Miss Pryde is no stranger to some absolutely terrible fashion choices, and to be honest we’d have been more shocked if she wore something good to the Gala. One can imagine the distress she causes Jumbo Carnation when she almost certainly insisted on the pirate boots and weird little accessories. However, Kitty isn’t Kitty without the messiness and it’s as endearing as ever. The tributes to her girlfriends Rachel Summers (in her mask) and Ilyana Rasputin (the metallic left arm) are definitely the saving grace of this look, as is the diamond brooch that was gifted to her by her employer, Emma Frost (go read Marauders it’s fabulous).
Like with Kitty, it’s hard to hold a bad fashion choice against Laura. She’s not exactly known to care about it much so this was probably something given to her that she’s wearing just because. Except for the asymmetry, that’s almost certainly Laura needing some flexibility in her dress. The use of the retro colors is fun, but overall a bland look for the X-Men’s new Wolverine.
#8 Emma Frost
Emma is probably the only X-Man who could appear on both my best dressed and worst dressed lists (keep an eye out for that one!). While Emma can look good in just about anything, this one is definitely stretching that to its limit. Going as some kind of diamond-encrusted Yeti is already a choice, but big chunky shoes that look like rocky candy and the scraggly boob window drive this into the nonsensical. With a crown like that you half expect her to start handing out Turkish Delight to all of the guests.
#7 Captain Britain
This one is just disappointing. Betsy is a former fashion model, and while I know that she’s still trying to remember how to dress herself now that she’s 6 inches of leg shorter…this is a mistake. It’s obviously taking cues from Victorian fashions with the puffed sleeves, and Elizabethan era ruff, and flared cuirass, which I do like. It’s a very “British” look. But the red Furiousa paint kind of makes the whole top a mess and the less said about the boot ruffles, the better. She looks a bit better on Nakayama’s cover, though.
Jason Wyndgard will never pass up a chance to dress up like an 18th-century plantation owner, even if he’s never gone full neck ruffle until now. The brown color is clearly a reference to his usual trenchcoat, but it’s a shame he didn’t do something like what he used to wear. The Purple and blue of the Dark Phoenix Saga were iconic, as were the muttonchops. To top it off, he looks like a mad scientist who just had a beaker blow up in his face, which doesn’t make anyone look dignified.
Bit of a shame for the fan choice member of the new X-Men team to turn in a look this weak. She looks good overall, but it’s hard for her to not look good. Though I wish her hair was bigger like in her classic look, she’s definitely embracing her colors i.e. green. There was a clear attempt to emulate maps of the magnetosphere (which is hilarious), but the material and shape make it look like she’s wearing a blown-out condom or some sort of weird pool toy. And I certainly hope it’s not as plastic as it looks, or Lorna is going to be super sweat sticky by the end of the night.
Much like with Betsy, this is a disappointment. Now, he is a bisexual disaster and we can’t really expect him to go as wild as we’d like, but is just a grey suit with some pattern really the best he can do? I mean, why would he even wear a shirt? This might be a symptom of the new Akihiro who wants to be a little less wild, but either way, it’s just a very bland choice for a gala that’s all about excess. The lack of shoes is very on-brand, however.
I have zero idea why Xi’an decided that she wanted to look like an oversized bow from a car commercial, but she did and now we have to live with it. The chunky (understatement) pink earrings are fun though, and there’s a good through line of that shape in the clasps and buttons on her outfit. But why do her shoes have collars! Why is she just wearing…nothing underneath the big coat? Like with Polaris, she is going to be baking under that thing. And then what will she do?
Hank can you please, for once in your life, make an effort?
#1 Professor X
The worst dressed person at this whole affair is, perhaps unsurprisingly, Charles Xavier. My man got a brand new body and decided that yes, unitards are the thing that should comprise his entire look. Only now he’s accentuated it with a bunch of ostentatious bling and weird smoke effects? We all know that deep down Charles is a suburban rich kid who’s never had to pick out his own clothes in his life, but never has that been more apparent. The gilded Cerebro helmet is kind of fresh, though.
(Dis) Honorable Mention: The Rest of X-Force
I could have filled this with X-Force looks because they are the most boring looks of the whole gala. I know they’re security but, in-universe and out, this is weak. Sage looks good like she always does, but you’d expect something a little more “Hellfire” from her, and Domino clearly raided Chuck’s unitard closet. That wouldn’t be so bad if they didn’t also decide that the accessory they all needed were bolo ties, something that was probably Logan’s suggestion. Please remember to never take fashion advice from Logan. That’s the moral of the story.
Was that harsh? Maybe! But you probably have your own opinions about the gala, and I’d love to hear them! And keep an eye out for my much more positive Best Dressed list coming soon!
Images via Marvel Comics
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